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Feb. 8th, 2005 @ 06:06 pm
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Sorry bout the fucked up posts. Been using roomate's internet, and consequently have allowed him access to my account. |
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Nov. 13th, 2004 @ 11:27 am
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Been awhile since I've been here. Too long. Think it's a month? Partially moved down with Kara in New Westminster. Been okay up until recient. got stoned yesterday morning, and forgot how worried I become when stoned. Anyways, I'm not here to bitch. I'm here because if you're reading this, most likely, I desperately miss you, and hopefullly will try and get in contact with you. I've dug myself another hole of guilt that I am trying to recover from. Bad habit of mine is to have too many friends widly spread apart. Consequently I spread myself too thin, and no one remembers me for long. 'Yea I'll be your friend, but only talk to you some of the time. It's nothing personal, just I have to be in touch with other peoples.' Anyways, feel too guilty calling up Mike cuz i havent talked to him in over 2 months. Way too long as I said before. And hence the reason for not calling people when i should've.
Anyways, not ready to accept that ive lost my job. Trying to recover it somehow. Dont think it'll work though. So now i have another semi importaint desicion: Do i move back home in the north shore, and put myself a month back in progress, or find a job out here, and live around this area. Or maybe go to school. Anyways, in a few months, it wont matter.Current Mood:  okay |
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Oct. 5th, 2004 @ 11:36 am
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Life is good.. Except when you work 40+ hours a week at a job you hate. Ahh well, what else can you do. Making lotsa money ^_^. If you come to Safeway at Parkgate, I'll most likly be there! Anywho, I've given up with other people's shit that they have against me. Fuck it. I'm having fun.. And all those who don't return my calls, fuck off... If i don't call you, well then nevermind. My apologies, and will try to call.
I'm sorta dissapointed with what I've done these last many months: NOTHING. Sitting around, worring about shit that doesn't even matter. While things that do matter are passing right by without a second glance. I've spent my time in relationships which were, sad to say, but pritty damn pathetic; and trying to be friends with people who believe they're much better as a person than I am. Fuck off. All this while money problems are adding up; I'm fucking up things with good friends; moving back home, which does suck, but has to be done; and not doing shit about my education.
Well I'm glad I'm slowly gaining a better perspective on things. But knowledge is gained with time. Two months from now, I'll look back, and think what I'm doing now is all wrong. Well, wisdom is gained with age i suppose.
Yesterday was Catherine's birthday, and I was too tied up to call her. Damnit man! Well I hope you had a great day. And i wish to see this bowling thing through.Current Mood:  sore Current Music: White Stripes - The Air Near My Fingers |
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Sep. 29th, 2004 @ 01:12 pm
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At the library again since PC access is very limited. Picked up 'The good, the bad and the ugly' and 'Dick Tracy'. Trying to follow up on some older type movies.
Anyone like to go alpine hiking? If so, tell me. I'd like to go maybe with someone I know.
Trying to get in contact with Donavin, but can't for some reason. Call me!
I think im going to move down to New Westminster with a few friends. I'll be sleeping on the couch, in a crowed basement. 5 people are living there in a 2 bedroom suite already, so it is very crowded, but it'll be fun. For awhile atleast.
Cell's disconnected once again. Work is taking their time paying me, so i can't yet pay for my cell phone. Till that happens, call me at home. Please. Need to get out. 980 5484.
Kristina, you seem distant. Are you alright?
Oh, and Jordi: I'd like to get together.. If you're okay with that.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to volunteer for Greenpeace?!? I swear, it seems impossible. Spent the last week and a bit calling different offices, and they keep telling me i have to go to Toronto to apply to some sort of meeting there. That's bull! Im not going to Toronto to volunteer!Current Mood:  blah |
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Sep. 14th, 2004 @ 11:24 am
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Well, go me! Got my job at Safeway, but they refused to tell me exactly which position i would fill. It ranged from clerk, night crew, and cashier. But i am sorta worrying because they have to do a reference check. Fortunatly i convinced them not to call Canadian Tire, cuz they hate me there, so they're going to call Pizza Hut instead, which isn't much better. Eek. Better not lose my job before i even start.
Spent more time with Heather and had fun again. In the rain. Pouring evil rain.
Aparently Mike F and people have been friends with me only becuase I was going out with their friend. And now that we're not together, they're ignoring me. Bastards.
Looking forward to going to Mandy's this week if at all possible. I get to see people that I miss oh so much!
Well I have to go study for my Safeway test on thurs. Fun fun! Oh, and 3 more days till I see Kristina again!Current Mood:  pleased |
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Well, waiting at your local library for the safeway manager to come back so i can give her my resume. Fun fun. Getting new glasses on friday. Maybe i should go for contacts. Or both. Thinking bout thick black geek glasses...
Heather and Aimee are fun to see again. Especially when stoned. Heather was sorta nervous though. Usually I can get people to calm down and be mellow while stoned, but she refused to. Oh well.
Catherine, you have a bday! Soon?!?
Umm, did I miss Kaylie's birthday or something? Havent heard bout it. Is it next weekend perhaps?
I've been socaily evicted. Have little connections with few people. Miss you so much! Stupid school taking up people's time...
Also miss Dnd. Dammit Callum.
Well, i better go back and check on my safeway person. Wish me goodluck!
Sep. 13th, 2004 @ 02:20 pm
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| » =) |
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I miss people. I've been horribly sick these last few days, but i'm almost better. Hopefully in time for this weekend. Haven't seen some friends in an extordinarly long time. Miss you soo much!
I'm so very happy with the situation between Kristina and I. Everything seems to be going along so nicely. My gawd how I've fallen for her. Well except for her being grounded till the 17th. Jeez! That's a long time that I have to sneak her out, or bend rules and such.
Nothing else has been interesting as of late. Not going to school. Kinda sucks seeing everyone busy and such. Sorta miss it to be honest. Maybe I'll go back to school in January.
Jordie, I'd like to spend some time with you. If you're not too busy, call me up. Maybe we can go visit argyle together or something.
Anyways, lotsa love everyone.
Sep. 10th, 2004 @ 11:02 am
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| » Drama |
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Well.. I hate drama. I swear you could write a soap on my social life.
Heather was hanging off of guys when drunk, and when drunk, your real intentions come though. And so my trust in her was broken, and was difficult to repair. Friends told me to break it off, but I could not, and eventually Heather had to. She did on wensday, but told me she still had feelings for me, and not to flirt with anyone.
Sorry for thinking this, but What Nerve! You latch onto my friends while we were together, and betray my trust, and now you ask me to not tuch anyone?!
Well, I met someone a few days ago, and now we're together, but it so happens that this girl, Kristina, is Heather's closest friend. Now Heather wants Kristina to choose between herself and me. Kristina won't choose, nor should she, and so Heather is going to sacrifice their friendship over it.
And now she's got the idea that we've had sex, and that i pritty much raped her.
And to add to the fun, a friend of mine is mad over Kristina.
No matter, Kristina really is wonderful to be around, and i really do care for her, and as long as we care for eachother, things will work out for the better.
Aug. 28th, 2004 @ 11:29 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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Well well well... Last few days have been plesant enough. Heather broke my trust on friday 13th, but she hasn't been flirting at all since, apparently, so now i have to start rebuilding my trust in her. It's not an easy thing to do. She's also kinda distanced herself from me lately too, which is annoying. But whatever.. Nothing really i can do. I think.
Why haven't I seen Mike, Mandy, Bree in a number of weeks? I miss you peoples. Where did you go?
Apparently Stu and Donavin are pissed at me cuz what assholic things ive done to Teya. They have certain right to be pissed off, but to be an asshole right back at me? Okey.. sure.
Waiting for Heather to call cuz we're supposed to get together this morning, but i haven't heard from her.
Dream't that I climbed ontop of Cam's roof in the middle of the night, and woke up his mother, who came outside, and yelled at me. So I went to my car, and crashed it. Then went into Cam's basement, where in the closet there was a bird making an annoying shrieking noise, and that's when i got a call from Saskatuwan from Peirce. So I drove over there, and was locked away in prison. I shot a guard underwater, and escaped into the sewers, to find a cute girl prisoner living down there. We both esacaped to the side of a lake, and ran. I lost her, but found a group of guards throwing rocks at me and some other guy, so I kept running, and hid under a log in the woods. I took off my orange shirt, but my orange pants were giving me away. That's when a guard dog sniffed me out, and an overweight guard and his gf sat on the log above me. Then they helped me escape. Then i woke up to a lawnmower outside my apartment.
Never mind.
Aug. 25th, 2004 @ 10:02 am
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| » Festivus falling apart |
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Anyone want to come with me to Festivous this weekend?? $12 for tickets + $5 for the ride up. Big 24h outdoor rave up near squamish. I reserved positions for myself and Heather, but Heather bummed out, so now i either bum out on my sis who organized the ride up for me, or I find someone else to go with. By myself would be too boring. Dammit Heather, stop doing stuff so that I can see you. Driving me mad.
Miss people. Where are you guys??? Well the weekend's here so maybe ill beable to see you? Please come to Festivus with me =).
Aug. 20th, 2004 @ 10:42 am
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| » (No Subject) |
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Too bad i found out about this too late, cuz i woulda loved to have people go to it - http://www.thefreshpage.com/festivus2004.html
A friend of mine is DJing at it too ^_^.
Last few days have been wonderful with Pat, Mike, Cam and peoples. It's really quite amazing how marvelous these people are. My other friends at Stu's house have completely abandoned me - Stu and Jackie and those of such.. Oh well. Keep phoning them, and keep getting rejections, so whatever.
I'm so confused over Heather except for the fact that I really can't stop thinking bout her, and only in positive light. Love spending time with her, but I have to watch myself. Only view things for what they are, not what I hope them to become. She's such a sweetheart.
The only thing that bothers me bout Stu's rejection is that Teya was over there the entire time. She's always been supportive when I've been a complete dick. I've treated her like crap, and she's always been behind me, till now? It comes as a complete suprise that she'd tell me off all of asudden. She been wonderful to me, and all of asudden kicks me in the ass. Did i do something as of late to piss her off?
Going windsurfing in the next few days, and hope the weather is good for it. Last time i went there was no wind, and I had to paddle back to shore >_<. Fall is coming! The summer is finnaly ending!! Hurra! Sorry, but i hate the hot summer weather. Winter is still some time off, but keep your chin up right? Woke up with REM stuck in my head, so listened to them all day today, except cant find the song that i woke up to.
Aug. 18th, 2004 @ 01:19 pm
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| » Elvis!!! |
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Blacksugar.. I never knew you were out to get me! Quite strange it'd be elvis, cuz in gr 9 I was always called Elvis for some reason or another o_0
Aug. 18th, 2004 @ 01:16 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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Wow.. I'm sooo glad im drunk, rather than stoned tointe.. Over at Pat's, and the world is shifting the way it shouldn't.. Well I thought i'd type something that would make sence. Well sence without the consence stoping the real sence. Anywho - I'm sooo happy I could get wasted tonite. Heather seems to be so much closer to me as of late, and I'm glad of it. She's been such a sweetheart. And so have my friends for that matter. I need more 40% alchol sake... yumm.
Well I got my sake, and now i just socalized about polictical stuff, and now i shall explain my strong point of view:
Idealy I'd have a anarcist society. People always think that anarcism is murder, evil, chaos, and over all, bad. IT'S NOT! It's simply the lack of an organizational system.
It's people working for the greater good. Doing whatever suits them best. It's no-one ruleing over anyone else, but complete freedom. It's so left wing that there isnt any left-right wing system at all.
But since that's very unlikly to happen, my second option is to have a socilist government. That is what I belive it is to be proud to be Canadian. To be Canadian is to belive in the greater good, to be less conservative as other nations. To work for the people who you love and respect. To work for the community and the social order around you.
Both of these ideas do not stand for what we have for today which is working for people who run mulitple companies. People who you've never met. People who only stand for money, and nothing else.
WHY IS THIS COUNTRY FOLLOING THE USA!?!?!?!?!? Why are we privatising governmental companies??? Why are we selling away our nation to people who don't even live in Canada!?! Why are we becoming more and more conservative. The only way we move forward as a species is with change. Left-wing ideals are in favor of change while right-wing are in favor of staying in the position we are in.
I guess it makes sence in the the end... History repeats itself right??
Whenever the lower-class and middle class gets too large for the upper class, there is a revolution, and everything starts over again.
It seems to me that the upper class always votes conservative cuz they want to keep the money they have, and the power they control. The middle class keeps striving for more, but not as stongly as the lower class. The lower class always keeps growing, and almost always votes left-wing cuz they want equality in their lives with their superiors. Eventaly they reach out in radical movements in the form of a revolution.
Vote Greanpeace. They are mostly anarchist and in favor of the ecosystem.
Anywho...I'm drunk, so Ill leave be. Maybe I'll explain my point of view later. Anyone who's interested, PLEASE tell me cuz i LOVE explaining what i think about this governmental system. And discussing it to no end.
Goodnight everyone. I need some more sake.
Aug. 17th, 2004 @ 01:43 am
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| » Ho hum |
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Enough about Heather. Thoughts will stop. Well, I hope they do. Spent the last 3 days with Stuart, and a few others, but couldn't socialize. Just pritty much kept to myself or one other person. Not getting along too well with Stu's gf, Jackie. Not Jax! She was kind enough to come over to my place with food when i was on my own, but now she expects something back from me, so she gives me shit whenever she can, and refuses to let me have anything from the fridge. Fucker....
Still on a low note latly, but would really like to see other people. It'd help me get back up to my former self. I think ill try going to this Corn maze thingy.
People tell me to break things off with Heather, but I cannot. So I remain, caring for her as much as i did before, just with maybe a lack of trust. Follow your heart right? And That's what ill do.
Aug. 16th, 2004 @ 01:18 pm
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| » One weird night |
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My God, what a fucked up night.. All i have to thank for is that i didn't get either stoned, nor too drunk. Phew.. dont want to know what woulda happened if i did that.
Well I was told to go to Pat's for a party, and I deceided to invite Heather along. It goes well enough, except whenever Heather gets impared, she almost completely ignores me. That's why i shouldnt get stoned, cuz i get REALLY paranoid and depressed when stoned, and having my gf ignore me is only going to make me feel like im in hell. Believe me, it's happened before. I really can't complain i guess. Sure, it'd be nice if someone i strongly care about could latch onto me, but comprimises must be made.
Well, then i talk to Paul for awhile, and sort things out. It's a good thing =). Really glad Paul doesn't hate me or anything cuz he sure has reason to =/. But he doesn't and everything is dandy. Paul rocks.
So, I'm outside on the porch, and through the window i see Heather doing something i dont really like. Im sorta drunk, so every second thought is about her. I'm trying to have a conversation with someone, but I can't keep my concentration, so I ask Nick to close the blinds to the window. Out of sight, out of mind. It works to a degree. Afterwards I tell him why, and ask him to tell me if he sees anything questionable that Heather does.
Well.... He then tells me that Heather has done some un-named questionsable things in the past. Can't really tell what cuz I really want to fix things with her if at all possible, and going too far indepth will probably hinder those chances.
She's done a few things in the past, and then following during the next hour or so, every person at the party comes up to me and says something about what Heather's done, or this or that. Maybe they're right... But i don't want to believe it. I really strongly care for her, and will do anything to make it work. But i suppose she's still young, and doesn't know who she is or anything like that, but you can't give up on someone just as things get bumpy. It's called working at a relationship. And It'll work with her.
Well, to continue my saga, I call up Teya, and talk to her for a few hours, and eventually invite her over. I really did invite her way too late into the night, cuz when she got here, i was about to fall asleep.
Teya is one of the best people i can be around when down... She's such a good support. So wonderful.
Anyways, you can guess how the night goes, but here i am in the morning, remembering it all... Now i kinda do feel like Dead End by Sam Roberts...
Oh, I almost forgot: Am i being too sensitive, or do other people have the same thoughts when someone is sleeping, and you go to lay down beside her, then later, she gets up, and moves somewhere else? But then sometimes i get so sensitive that when sleeping beside someone, they turn over to face opposite to you, and you worry just a tad cuz of it? Did i do something???
Aug. 14th, 2004 @ 10:58 am
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| » TGIF |
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Soo.. Got pritty stoned while watching the meteor shower last night with Heather, and a few others.. Really enjoyed myself with Heather, but i had to get up at 6:45 inorder to leave her friends house before her parents woke up. Dammit im tired.
Pat and Callum left FFXI! Now I'm all alone in this scary word. *sniff*. Stupid shadowbane.. who like shadowbane anyways? Well I'll give em hell when I see Pat tonite. Oh, my cell's back up again ^_^.
Really getting interested in the Greanpeace campains. Is anyone else interested in going to a North West Social Forum in Seattle?? Or going somewhere with me in an activist campain?
Check out Greenpeace for news
Whatever happened to the Dnd?? Is anyone playing that anymore?!
Stu's mother is gone.. hurra! But haven't been able to see him in quite some time, and I do wish to. Mike - Call Me!.. Cant seem to get a hold of you.
Anyone like Sam Roberts? NOT in regards to Heather, but I kinda feel like 'Dead End' latly...
Anywho.. hope to see you guys this weekend =)
Aug. 13th, 2004 @ 03:34 pm
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| » Well.. |
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Once again.. Computers are fun, and it's nice when you can have acess to one. LOVE being round Heather.. Seems to be going really well. Well enough atleast, but I left her yesterday on a low note >_<. I wish she would not worry so much. Be happy? And please don't start hiding things from me. Tell me what you're feeling and thinking. It'll be better if you do. Anyways, Teya hates me =(.. I really keep fucking things up with her. I feel terrible about the situation I've put her in, and now she runs away from me.... Dont blame her.
Love seeing people at under the volcano. And the fireworks prior. Really having fun as of late. In certain areas at least ^_^. Amiee.. You rock. I really love you =). Sorry you were so bored at under the volcano, but you've been so much help to me lately. Paul - I'm sorry if ive done anything to piss you off. I'd like to become friends again. Anyways. Luv you all.
Aug. 11th, 2004 @ 09:03 pm
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| » Fireworks. . . again ^_^ |
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Soo... once again, no one goes to the fireworks. Oh well.. I went with a friend i havent seen in awhile, Heather, and I had alot of fun with her and her girlfriend =). Although i kinda felt like her gf was becoming a bit of a third wheel. Feel quite bad. Hope she enjoyed it. Well Teya also went to the fireworks as well with ummm... crap.. cant remember his name. Well the guy that has a huge crush on her. Hoped to see her that night, but no luck.
This weekend is a camping thingy that, ofcourse i hear of at the last moment.. But no matter. If i go or not, i have fun camping (which i had been looking forward to for along time), or I go to Under The Volcano with Heather (which would be tons of fun ^_^). Rose, do me the favor and come back from camping on friday just to go out camping again for the weekend??
Oh, and another rant about Heather. Heather is soooo sweet, and I can't help but hoping that she'll decide to get back together again. Things have been better lately, and i really hope this works out. Well, that wasn't really a rant, but hey..
Pierson - You dickhead! Didn't call now did you?
Dad - You dickhead! Give me my computer back!
Catherine - You dickhead! Uhh.. we love you!
Aug. 5th, 2004 @ 07:11 pm
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| » CELL IS BACK ON! |
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Alot of my posts come in doubles.. but here it is:
MY CELL PHONE IS RECONNECTED!!!!!!
Now You Can Call At 604 726 2122!!
Aug. 4th, 2004 @ 01:17 pm
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| » Fireworks, but everyone is gone.. =( |
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Well, once again, im going to the fireworks, but no one else is going except for Heather and her friend. Not that i'm complaining or anything =D. I get to see her again!! But everyone else has dissapeared camping, or elsewhere. Oh, and Amanda, pick up your phone! Miss peoples. Oh well...
Aug. 4th, 2004 @ 12:53 pm
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